- ‘World Spins Madly On’ by The Weepies
I have never read a self-help book about grief, and I do not intend this to be one. One reason for this is that I would not presume to know the gravity or depth of your grief and how ‘best’ for you to ‘deal’ with it. Another reason is that I am the worst person for taking advice and would not expect you to hither to mine as a resort to figuring out your own heart. Lastly, I am young, and I only know that which life has presented me thus far - but I am learning, and so share with you my experiences in the hope that they might encourage you through yours.
My name is Rachelle, I am currently 21 years old. When I was 15 my Mum was diagnosed with Pulmonary Hypertension, a condition which like so many wears down the body gradually and manifests itself in breathlessness and general exhaustion. She passed away when I was 19, 3 days before her 50th Birthday, 10 weeks before my brother was due to be married. She is my reason for being, for writing, for believing and for loving the way that I do. Her great faith and gentle spirit encompassed so many in her lifetime. She was not a bold woman in the sense of being loud, proud, or in-charge. Rather, it was in her calming presence, continuing kindness and constant strength which surpassed understanding, and reached many a heart, that she showed me the way.
Ever since I was little I have had the habit of writing whether it be poems, diaries, letters or lyrics and I guess as a natural outlet of comfort I turned to this passion just as life’s chaos flooded around me in 2011. In sharing my experiences with people I have had many uplifting conversations and have heard heart-tugging stories in response to my own. I realise that death is something that we will all experience, but it is something rarely spoken about - especially in my age group. I studied English and Film Studies at the University of Dundee until May last year when I decided that I would take a gap year to turn my diaries, focused on my Mum and family through her illness, into a book - this book.
I started a blog about my book in May 2012 and it continues to be a popular read for family, friends, acquaintances and even the odd stranger. I have been encouraged greatly to continue writing, and shall do so until I am done. I have so much to be thankful for in my life, it is only in the past few years that I have begun to realise just how much, and started to learn how to say thank you to the One who has blessed me so greatly - but I know I am young and have much much farther to go.
"Teach us to realise the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom."
- Psalm 90:12]]
Thank you for reading! Please do let me know what you think, if not by a comment then an email or via Facebook :]
For your efforts, here is a lovely song: