I don't know if you're out there. I don't know if you can hear me.

I haven't blogged since November, and that makes me a little sad. I also haven't written in a diary since before then as I've just not had the time. This year has been a challenge, to say the least, yet as I make my way back to sea level I can see there is hope and joy and good things to come.

Long story short: this year so far I have lost my handbag including purse, passport, Bible and phone in it just before I was due to go to the ABSS retreat in Gemunden, and this last week I lost my job which I loved and took for granted that it would set me up working full time over the summer. 

This time of year is particularly interesting as Mother's Day draws near and shops are glorified with 'special gifts' for the 'most special person on the planet'. Needless to say it pains me a bit when I remember that my most special person is no longer on the planet, and hasn't been for quite some time now. 

I have had innumerable freak-outs this year, to which my love Scott will confirm, but I have been humbled in the way he encourages me to be strong when I feel that the world is telling me I'm worthless, stupid and unwanted. Sometimes it's easy to think we're alone in this world, being victimised by others. Scott reminds me that I am not alone, and I have overcome so much already - too much to give up now.

It is easier to believe criticism than it is to remember compliments and, surprisingly enough, I'm really going to try harder at keeping a positive attitude when faced with challenges. 

Looking back over my previous posts I know that I have been blessed with a family so great and strong that no matter where I am, even 300 miles away from my hometown, I have a home wherever they are. For that, I am grateful, and I know things will get better soon. 







If you have a very weak stomach, don't watch this - it contains zombies...
If you happen to not mind zombie images, give this a go, it's pretty good!